To The Mom of the Child That Constantly Runs around in Public Naked…

the naked kid

Did you ever see that child?  You know—the one in public NAKED as the day he was born?  Except it’s been a few years since he was born.

I have seen that kid around town A LOT lately.

He’s naked at the nearby lake.

He’s naked at the school playground.

He’s naked at a local transitional home for formerly homeless men.

He’s practically naked at church.

Yep.  I have seen that kid A LOT—and every time I see him, I wonder—WHY IN THE WORLD DON’T HIS PARENTS MAKE HIM PUT ON HIS CLOTHES?????

It drives me NUTS!

Literally NUTS!

And then I realize I am that naked kid’s mom.

And all of that public nudity is my problem.

And what am I going to do about it???

Well, considering I have two toddlers and no sanity—I guess naked he shall remain.

He won’t go to kindergarten like this, will he?

;)

Father’s Day—all bleached out!  

  
I can’t recall which site I saw this idea on, but it was so simply brilliant and beautiful, we had to do it for our daddy this Father’s Day!

Here’s what you need:

Bleach in a spray bottle

A cotton shirt for dad—dark colors work best

A hanger

Outside to spray

Contact paper

Your children — the offsprings of their daddy!

This is what you do:

You trace your child’s hand on the contact paper 

You cut it out and place it strategically on the shirt

You hang the shirt and go to a safe place to spray bleach

You spray around the hand and however much more if the shirt you want

You let hang dry for about 1 hour

You leave the contact paper on while you wash and dry the shirt in your laundry machines after it had about an hour of drying outside

You fold and give daddy the Best Present Ever!!!!

Additional information:

We cut a small heart in the handprint before we sprayed the bleach

We did a light gray shirt and it did not work well

We did our project with Daddy!  He had so much fun!  After we played a bunch of games while it all dried outside and then we gave it to him the next day one kid at a time, where he immediately stripped off the shirt he was wearing and replaced it with one of the shirts from his children. 

Happy Father’s Day Fun, Daddy! 

Babies Don’t Keep. It’s so true. So sit down and rock your sleeping one.

babies don't keep

After my daughter’s end-of-the-year ceremony at school, I held my youngest as she slept.  I initially felt HORRIBLE sitting and holding her.  I had a mountain of dishes and laundry to do.  When you have two toddlers at home, every precious moment they sleep is a small miracle that needs to be used and abused by doing what you CAN’T === absolutely CAN’T do when they are awake.  Because, if you have lived with toddlers, you know that when they are awake they take over the world.  Serious world dominion takes place.  Especially when they are only a year apart, can’t breathe without the other, have no boundaries on climbing walls, and LOVE to take everything out of the trash.  And the mystery of it all is that they seem to do it all in one breath!

But I sat anyway.  And within moments, I felt so completely at peace with my decision that I held my daughter for an entire hour while she slept.  I literally did nothing but hold her and enjoy the peace of her being.  Her breathing.  Her cherub face.  Her small fingers.  Her chubby legs.

And I took in the warm breaths against my chest and I savored the feeling of completeness that my children bring me.

I loved it.

And I am so glad that I don’t look back at that moment with regret.  Regret about not using my time to do the dishes.  Regret about the time to do the laundry.  Regret about the time I had to sip a coffee and have a few mommy-alone moments (because right now I don’t even get those in the bathroom.  haha!).

Most of us have probably heard the story of the nurse from Australia that worked with hospice patients at the end of their lives—and the one thing she learned from them was that their lives were full of only 1 regret:  Not spending enough time with their families.

Therefore, I sat.  I smelled.  I held.  I cherished.  Through my baby’s sleep, I lived.  And through my quiet moments with her, I learned.   I learned that time spent with my children is the most valuable time I will ever spend.

I encourage you today—choose your children because Babies Don’t Keep.

“Babies Don’t Keep”
Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing, make up the bed,
Sew on a button and butter the bread.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I’ve grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,
Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo

The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo
But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo
Look! Aren’t his eyes the most wonderful hue?
Lullabye, rockaby lullabye loo.

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow
But children grow up as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep!
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.

Author Ruth Hulburt Hamilton

Minion Mom Monday: A Boundless Supply.

monica

During a long overdue conversation, a friend of mine and I were discussing how Jesus’ instruction for us to love one another is seemingly so simple, but in practice it is so so very hard.  It’s not hard just because some people are annoying or rude or weird OR because we are busy or lazy or tired. It’s hard because it is constant.  Really loving people involves lots of time and patience. And that is hard.

Taking a meal, writing a note, picking someone up every now and again, while so very important, are not necessarily difficult and are not generally a burden. We do these things, feel the warm glow of caring about a brother or sister, and then go on our merry way. But what about the times when the sickness doesn’t go away in the proscribed time, the problem doesn’t sort itself out with a thoughtful note, or when one or two trips or meals turn into one or two dozen. What then? That’s what I think Jesus is talking about when He instructs us to love each other. To love the way He wants us to, is to love past what is comfortable, to love past what is easy, to love past the point of our capability and experience and knowledge. To love like Jesus is to let Jesus love through us. Man, that’s hard.

The fabulous news is that God IS love, so we have access to a boundless supply of what He asks us to give.  Thank you, Jesus!

Are you tired of loving someone? Are you tired of the emotional or physical strain? Are you at your love limit? Ask God to give you a shot of His love, to give you His ability to love the momentarily unlovable and He will be faithful to equip you to do just that.

A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.

John 13:34

***

Beautifully written by Monica Henry at @minionmom.  Please click her Gravatar to learn more about Monica!

No offense, Mom. I pretended like I was you last night… SAY WHAT?!

“Niney.  Niney girl, wake up!”  I said gently stroking her face.  Niney is what she has been called since she was a little one running around calling herself Nine-Nine.

“Niney.  Niney.  Why are all of your blankets on the ground?”  I prodded, as I continued to gently stroke her face trying delicately to wake the sleeping giant (She is NOT a morning person.  Which means enter her morning lair with extreme caution and soft words ;) )

“No offense, Mom, I was pretending like I was you last night.”

“You mean—sleeping on the ground?!”

“Yes.”

Friends—my kids have caught me.

This is what my life has come to…

My kids in what would (in far far far stretches of other worlds) be my dream…

Living as I lead.  Following my example.  Being like Mommy.

Except this Mommy DOES NOT WANT TO SLEEP ON THE GROUND ;)

It’s just that is sometimes as far as I can make it…

And, apparently, my daughter finds this ONE thing to imitate???

“No offense, Mom…”

Yeah.  Right.

I have 3 offenses (Ada, Max, Jo)—and it was the chocolate, Coke, bag of chips, and late night TV that saved my sanity but kept me on the ground.

Ah well…At least she’s trying to be a bit like good ol’ mom, eh?????

No offense taken, Kid.

At least this time.

Now, clean up my mess!

That famous mantra “Silence is Golden”??? So NOT true when you have toddlers.

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What’s that famous mantra again that we use in our homes or classrooms or out in public “Silence is Golden”???

Yeah.  That is just such a falsehood when it comes to raising mischievous toddlers.

My husband…the dear old man (okay—39 is only old to children)…is off again.

It happens frequently in my life if you have been following this blog from it’s origin.

Anyhow—he is leading a men’s retreat this weekend.  Now, mind you, he barely returned home Monday night.

Therefore, he was technically home for 4 glorious days.

When I say glorious, you should understand that means busy and crazy and two of those nights he was gone as well—but he bathed the kids in between his few hours at home ;)

And I really don’t mind.

But tonight as I am trying to put new sheets on my toddler number 1 bed because he soiled his sheets this morning—I have toddlers 1 and 2 (so they are Josephine age 17 months and Maxwell age just now 3) playing with his electric and awesome train set.  Easy peasy because the trains shall babysit—right????

So I leave the two toddlers and begin to arrange for my 9-year-old to get in bed as well.

Brush teeth?

Check.

PJs?

Check.

All your clips from your dance recital out of your hair?

Check.

Bed made and ready for entrance?  Radio adventure on?  Disco light dancing?

Check; check; check.

That’s when it hit me…

It was TOO electric train silent!

So Adelyne and I run to the toddlers room (shared room) and discover not a single minion in there.

Where to go next?

It’s a small home, so it’s not too hard to follow the noise—but there was no noise.

Turns out the little devils found their way into the bathroom.  Our bathroom is also our laundry room.

And a small (yet large when your husband is out of town and you are so tired because you have already changed soiled bed sheets from toddler oldest and cleaned up puke in the car from toddler youngest today as well as cleaned out a poopy potty training toilet and changed the Mt. Everest of stinkiest diapers in the world today—and that’s coming from a woman who literally lives only 100 meters from an actual pig farm—STINKY)…

Oh, let me get back to the story—

A small but LARGE snowball fight of laundry soap was taking place.

Lots of THROWING high in the air and then a mad dash away with giggles.

The next would run in and overtake the laundry box and grab a handful and throw, dash, and giggle.

Lather.  Rinse.  Repeat.

Why oh ye little monsoons???  WHY?

I run in all mommy-threatening like.

Yet they don’t respond.

How is that possible?

I totally scare myself at times.

My husband cowers.

My eldest runs for cover.

These Littles…Perhaps they realize that I am too old.  They literally have no fear.

So I catch the closest—my son!  I whisk him into his room, finish putting on his pajamas, he’s yelling, “NO!  It’s WAKE TIME!  WAKE TIME!”  as I begin tossing him (literally) in bed, so I can scamper quickly off to catch the other rebel.

She squeals and tries to dart away.

Man!  That girl is getting fast!

I grab the chub and gently (after all, she is my baby ;)), toss her in bed—turn on her light song music thing and her giraffe cuddle thing and give her the one million blankets she sleeps with at night—

I kiss them both in this hurry before they begin to BAWL kiss-y way and pray silently in my head while mad dashing out the door with a BAM (slamming my hand on the light switch) and actual SLAM of the door … drowning out any tears and sobs that might ensue with my super mommy “I Don’t Hear Nothin'” ears on.

Now to the 9-year-old.

You would think she would be easy, right?

So wrong.

“Ow!  I have a bruise.  I need ice on my foot.  I need ice to eat as well.  I can’t hear my radio drama.  Can I read???”

Kiss, kiss, kiss.

So proud of you for your dance recital today.

I will get you ice—NOT for your bruise.  You will survive.

No, you can’t read.

Yes, you can read in the morning IF you get up early.

No, I won’t leave the light on for you.

Yes, you must go to sleep.

Dear Jesus, pray, pray, pray…

DASH down the stairs—get a cup of ice—dash up the stairs…THROW ice cubes at her (just kidding).

Kiss on forehead and RUN out of room before 1 million questions begins again.

SLAM second door of the night.

Start more poopy laundry from daughter’s diaper explosion (second round of poopy laundry for the day—I HAVE mentioned that, right???)…

Run downstairs.  GRAB Coke (not the drug) and chocolate.

Serenity now????

We shall see, my friends.  We shall see.

After all, I still have NO gate and 3 dogs literally tied up to the trees outside—I have yet had the energy for their evening walk and to bring them in.

Perhaps they will stay tied to the tree tonight?

Or will they chew through their leashes and run away?

How much crying can I handle in the morning???

Who knows, but as I type this there are 3 sleeping kids and I must say that mantra is kind-of true, “Silence is Golden” (as long as kids are sleeping).

Here we go…

IMG_2828

Richard’s brother asked how many takes this took to make this video.

Let me tell you—one.  The only one.  I mean, really?  How in the world can you duplicate that?  It was perfect in all timing.

Here I was walking the dogs when I found a fox hole.  And then I called and had my daughter come out.  And then we called and had daddy and Max come out.

And then we decided that Adelyne (because she is normally crazy) would have a bunch of fun dancing to the music in front of the fox hole.  And so we played the music.

Well, Adelyne decided she really wanted the dogs to dance with her.  And, surprisingly???? the dogs were not interested.  So, while she spent her time chasing the dogs, daddy is in the background going crazy with his son to the music.

It is and will be a family classic for keeps.  Now, whose wedding will it play at?  Maxwell’s (in daddy’s arms)?  Adelyne’s (running after the dogs)?  Or perhaps simply at Richard’s birthday or our 50 year anniversary????

In any case, it was fun to make but WAY more fun to watch!

Enjoy.

xo

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